lotrspnfangirl (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
lotrspnfangirl) wrote2015-03-12 10:45 pm
lotrspnfangirl) wrote2015-03-12 10:45 pm
Screaming Color -- Ch. 9 This Love
Title: Screaming Color (9/14)
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Jensen/Jared
Warnings: Past abuse (physical and emotional), referenced rape/non-con
Disclaimer: I do not personally know, nor do I own, Jensen or Jared. This is purely fictional.
Summary (shortened): Jared escapes his hometown, and his past, for a fresh start in the bright and busy city of New York. Jensen has been stationed in the city for the better part of the last four years. When they finally get together, neither one wants to let their fears or scars hold them back. But when the world around you doesn’t actually know you, and the demons of your past threaten to break you, can love really conqueror all?
A/N: Any feedback is welcome! It fuels the fire :)
Other stories/chapters can be found in the Fiction Index
Chapter Nine: This Love
“Clear blue water, high tide came and brought you in
And I could go on and on, on and on, and I will
Skies grew darker, currents swept you out again
And you were just gone and gone, gone and gone
In silent screams, in wildest dreams
I never dreamed of this.”
‘This Love’ by Taylor Swift, 1989.
Jared rolled his eyes, setting down his glass and leaning back on his arm which was resting on the bar. He had finally let his brother convince him to get out of the house and Jeff had managed to find the most God awful karaoke bar in existence. His brother was belting out some country song, dramatically hitting on a girl at a table in front of the small stage.
It kind of reminded him of hanging out with Jensen and Tom. And there it was. He waved to the bartender, ordering a second beer and needing it now that his thoughts had returned back to his boyfriend. He sighed as he took the first sip, begging his phone to ring so he and Jensen could finally finish their conversation and so that Jared would stop having to worry.
He finally broke down two days ago, with too much prodding from Jeff, to send him an email. By the time he was done, he felt raw and exposed. But he apologized, and he hoped it would be enough.
There were now fifteen days until Jensen would be coming home. And it had been fourteen days since he had heard anything from Jensen at all. Although he knew the other man was angry, it was starting to get excessive and Jared had allowed his brother to drag him out in hopes of finally getting Jensen off his mind.
He knocked back his second beer, shaking his head as Jeff started wildly motioning for him to join him on stage. It would take a lot more alcohol for him to even consider picking up a microphone and singing in public. When Jeff had suggested the karaoke bar, Jared tried to high tail it the other way. Jeff didn’t have to see any of these people ever again, with Jared’s luck? Half of the operating room staff would choose this bar, on this night, to have drink after their shift.
Jeff hopped off the stage, making his way through the crowds of people to stand beside Jared, his face flushed and eyes sparkling. At least one of them was enjoying themselves.
“I’m going to take the phone away in a second, J-man.” Jeff chided, reaching for the drink he had left Jared to guard. Jared gave him a strange look before looking down. He hadn’t even realized he had taken his phone out of his pocket…
“I was just looking at the time.” He lied, and Jeff knew it.
“Come and sing, or dance with someone, or anything.” Jeff pleaded, nudging him in the shoulder.
“I think you’re making enough of a fool for both of us.” Jeff stuck his tongue out in response. “Mature.” Jared settled back in the chair once more as he brother slipped back out into the crowd. He almost didn’t notice when his phone started vibrating. Almost.
An unknown number flashing across the screen had him tearing out of his seat, rushing towards the door and out of the noise of the bar. He waved a hand, catching his brother eyes before he threw himself onto the street, the phone pressed to his ear.
“Jensen!” He gasped into the phone, not caring that he probably sounded like a lunatic. “God, I am so sorry babe… I know that I shouldn’t have lied to you and I know you have every right to be mad. I was so afraid you weren’t going to call me.”
“Um.” A soft voice came over the line and Jared straightened up, pulling the phone away from his ear to glance at the number again.
“Who is this?” He asked, replacing the phone back to his ear, trying to ignore the disappointment sinking in his stomach.
“Is this Jared Padalecki?” The girl on the other line asked slowly.
“Who is this?” Jared repeated, eyes darting up and down the street, just in case.
“My name is Mackenzie Ackles.” Jared froze, pushing himself to the side of the bar, away from the noise of the street. “I’m Jensen’s sister.”
“I know.” Jared whispered, fear replacing everything else. “No.” He shook his head before remembering he couldn’t be seen. “No, no, no, no…”
“Jared, please.” Mackenzie’s voice broke on the other end and he realized she was crying. Tears sprung to his eyes as he slumped down the wall, not caring that he was sitting on a dirty sidewalk, rain from earlier in the day soaking into the bottom of his jeans.
“No. Don’t. He can’t.” Jared stammered, shaking as the tears started falling down his face. He had spent the last two weeks with his emotions flooding from one extreme to the next, all aimed at Jensen, all while Jensen was… “Oh my God. I’m going to be sick.”
“He’s alive.” She said before a sob escaped her lips.
“Oh thank god.” Jared didn’t know if any two words could have sounded as good as that.
“But… God… Um, I’m so sorry this is how we’re talking for the first time. Um, Jen… he emailed me your number and told me that in-incase anything happened he wanted me to call you immediately.” She sobbed again and the sound sent chills through Jared. “He’s, um, he’s pretty hurt.”
“What happened?” Jared whispered, pulling his knees into his chest, an attempt to get warm, to stop shaking.
“Gr-grenade.” She sniffed, letting out a breath and Jared knew she was trying to compose herself to finish the conversation. “He was out on a mission, and they were attacked. I don’t know much about that… The Army isn’t one to give many details on that end.”
A grenade? What does that mean? How hurt is ‘pretty hurt’? What the hell happened? Questions flew through his mind, and he didn’t know which one to ask first. “When did this happen?” He asked finally, dreading the answer.
“Two weeks ago.” Mackenzie answered and Jared’s heart stopped. Two weeks, and Jensen hadn’t been able to call him or email him personally. How bad was ‘pretty’ bad? “They… well, I don’t know how it all works. But since he wasn’t on the base, they had to go through specific chains of commands and the Red Cross and contact my mother and—“ She cut herself off and Jared had to check the phone to make sure it hadn’t been disconnected.
“Mackenzie?”
“Yeah, I’m sorry… I just… My brother’s never cared about anyone enough to give me their number in case of emergency, you know?” Her laugh was short and clipped as she sniffed again. “They have him in a medically induced coma.”
“Is he here?” Jared asked, mind racing as he tried to think of how he could get to Jensen. He needed to get to him.
“No, he’s in Germany.”
“Fuck.” Jared swore, running a shaky hand through his hair.
“Do you love him?” The question came as a surprise and Jared had to ask her to repeat it. “I just… I need to know. Do you love him?”
“Yes.” Jared said, without hesitation. “Your brother is one of the most amazing people I have ever met. And yes, I love him, with everything I have.” His voice was thick with tears again as he tried to convey all of his feelings over, feeling the need to justify his feelings to Jensen’s sister since he couldn’t to the man.
“Okay.” Mackenzie blew out a breath. “Then we are doing something that maybe kind of illegal.”
“What?” Jared asked, confused once again. “I don’t…”
“When my mom was talking to the Red Cross they told her that when he was awake he said one thing, and one thing only. He said ‘J’ and they believed that he had been trying to spell something. But… I think you and I know that’s not what he was trying to say, right?” Jared’s heart clenched and Mackenzie took his sharp intake of breath as an answer. “I know my brother, Jared. And I know that if you were the first thing he was thinking of? He needs you, he needs you there even if he’s too stubborn to ask for it or say it out loud.”
“But we’re not… I mean… they’re not going to let me anywhere near him.” Jared looked up as he heard a noise beside him, his brother had appeared and was watching him carefully, a concerned look on his face. “We’re not married. I’m not family.”
“No, but you’re what he needs. Mom has already flown over and because he isn’t married, they should accept his siblings going. So I’m going to be leaving tomorrow. Do you have a passport?”
“Yes… but I still don’t understand how that’s going to help me see him.” Jared was still confused, but his heart picked up at the thought of seeing Jensen, no matter what shape he was in.
“You’re going to be my husband.” Mackenzie said simply. “And maybe they technically won’t extend an invitation to in-laws, but if we’re already there… what are they going to do? Tell you to leave? I spoke to mom about it a bit and she doesn’t think they’ll even ask.”
“Um. I don’t know what to say to that.” Jared said, shaking off his brother as Jeff tried to get out of him what was going on.
“I need my brother to be okay, Jared. I… I need him to come home. And from what he has said, and from what he hasn’t, I think you’re the best shot at helping that happen. If something happened to me? The one person that could get me through anything would be my fiancé. And, you say, Mackenzie, I am going to book a flight to Austin and I’ll meet you there. Thank you so much for getting two seats to Germany and I can’t wait to meet you.”
“I… okay.” Jared said, grabbing his brother’s arm and letting himself be hauled off of the ground. “I’m heading home to do that right now.”
“Okay. Good. I’ll see you tomorrow Jared… And I’m sorry this is how we’re meeting. From what my brother has told me though… I would be super excited to meet you under other circumstances.” Jared smiled softly and hung up, turning to face his brother.
“I need to go home.” Jeff nodded and turned around to hail a cab.
Jared nodded his thanks as security finished clearing him. He slipped his sneakers on and shoved his wallet and keys back into his pocket. He tried not to shove people out of his way as he made his way to the terminal. The sooner he got there, the sooner he could get this ball rolling, and the sooner he could get to Jensen. Although he knew that he wouldn’t be able to make the plane take off any faster than was scheduled, just being on the plane, on the way, would make him feel a million times better.
He found the terminal quickly enough and surveyed the few people that were already there, talking on cell phones or hunched over in conversations with their family and friends. He didn’t even know what Mackenzie looked like…
“Jared?” He felt a hand on his shoulder and turned around to see a short woman with blonde hair hanging in waves around her shoulders.
“Yeah, Mackenzie?” She smiled and nodded, then waved them over to a pair of seats by the windows. “How’d you know it was me?”
“Well, you looked a bit lost… and Jensen told me you were tall.” She smiled as she sat, crossing her legs and turning her body to face Jared. “He didn’t tell me you were like a tree though.”
“Yeah…” Jared laughed, sitting beside her. “So…”
“Yeah.” She replied, reaching over to take his hand in her own and squeezing gently. “This is not how I wanted us to meet.”
“No, me either.” Jared squeezed back, looking up to meet her eyes. “Jensen’s talked a lot about you. I didn’t think he had even told anyone about us dating, honestly.”
“He’s pretty stubborn.” She laughed. “He’s… he isn’t very open about his relationships, but he has his reasons. I don’t exactly give him a choice though. I usually get him to tell me everything.”
“You sound like my sister.” Jared smiled. “She can get me to spill, no matter how much I prepare myself for the onslaught, she always wins.”
“Good woman.”
“So… Um… How is he?” Jared asked after a moment.
“Well… I talked to my mom last night and from what I got, they were able to remove the shrapnel from his wounds. He had a piece that nicked his stomach, but they fixed that pretty quickly. Most of the damage was to his leg… There was a lot of tissue damage.”
“Is… I mean… He isn’t going to like, loose his leg or anything, is he?” Jared whispered, afraid for Jensen. He didn’t know how Jensen would react if that was the outcome…
“We don’t know.” Mackenzie whispered, pulling her hands back into her lap so she could twist the strap of her purse. “They removed all of the pieces… but he got an infection. He wasn’t very responsive to the antibiotics so they induced a coma. I don’t know what that has to do with anything but… he hasn’t woken up yet.” She pulled out her phone and clicked around the screen. “He has necrotizing fasciitis and I do not suggest looking that up.”
“What the hell is that?” Jared asked, knowing the second he could he would be looking it up.
“It’s the type of infection. It’s pretty scary.” Mackenzie closed her eyes and leaned back into the chair. “It’s called the flesh eating bacteria, and it’s pretty rare… and it’s usually… well… Jensen is in the hospital, and they know what they’re doing.”
Jared nodded carefully, letting silence fall around them.
If Jensen lost his leg… Jared closed his eyes, dropping his head into his hands. Jensen would lose it. His entire life was built around the military. Jared had never seen anyone talk about their job and light up the way Jensen did. Hell, he volunteered to go on this deployment for the simple fact that he felt he was helping his country and doing something important. If he lost his leg because of it…
Just from the conversations they had, Jensen would be lost. Sure, they had plenty of conversations where Jensen cursed the Army, complained about getting up at the ass crack of dawn, and wished that his contract was up and he was free. But Jared knew those were temporary thoughts, fleeing the moment they were spoken. Jared knew that the Army was part of the package that came with Jensen.
“Do you mind that I’m in the military?” Jensen asked, running his hands through Jared’s hair as they were sprawled out on the couch. “I mean, does it bother you?”
“Why would it bother me?” Jared opened his eyes, confused. “I sure as hell couldn’t do it… but it makes me proud that you’re a soldier, that you’ve served for your country.”
“I just know that it’s not the easiest thing in the world… And I’m deploying in a month and we haven’t really talked about it that much.” Jensen shrugged, tucking a strand behind Jared’s ear.
“No, it doesn’t bother me. Does it bother you?”
“No, I love it. I love the friend’s that I’ve made and the work that I do… I love knowing what I’m getting into every day. I have people who have my back, no matter what and there’s… I can’t explain that feeling. I would do anything for them, they’re my brothers.” Jared nodded, waiting to see if Jensen was going to continue. “I don’t always like the politics of it… I’ve… I’ve had a relationship fail over it before. And I just… The Army is a part of who I am. I am a military police officer, I don’t know how to be anything else and right now, I don’t want to be anything else. And that needs to be okay with you.”
“Babe… Why wouldn’t I be okay with that?” Jared reached over his head to grab Jensen’s hand, twisting their fingers together.
“Because it’s not easy hiding a relationship. Because it’s not easy being handed orders and having to pack up and move at the drop of a hat. Because this probably isn’t going to be the only deployment I will have, there will be more. Because if we are going to do this, you have to be okay with it. You have to understand that this is who I am, and this is what I do and I can’t change that, not for anyone.”
“Jen... I’m not asking you to change.” Jared squeezed his hand. “Am I terrified about this deployment? I would be lying if I said no. Do I hate that I can’t kiss you or hold your hand when we’re out with your friends? Yeah, I do. And I don’t fully understand why it’s such a big deal but I understand that it is to you. And I’m okay with that. I’m here for you, Jensen.”
“Okay.” Jensen whispered, leaning down to press his lips to Jared’s. “Thank you. I know it’s difficult… so, thank you.”
“You don’t have to thank me. You just have to kiss me again.” Jared smiled, releasing Jensen’s hand to reach up and grab the back of Jensen’s neck and pull him closer again.
“That I can do.”
“Jared?” Mackenzie reached over, patting his arm gently to get his attention. “We can board now.” Jared nodded, jumping out of his seat and shoving his hand in his back pocket to pull the ticket he had picked up out of his pocket. They made their way to their seats, Mackenzie taking the window seat so Jared could stretch out into the aisle if he needed to on their ride.
“I have never wished I could teleport more than right now.” He sighed, catching Mackenzie’s gaze.
“I know. This flight is going to take forever…” She tucked her purse between her legs, just barely under the seat and reached for the seatbelt – knowing it would be required for take off. “Jared?”
“Yeah?” Jared asked, fastening his own belt.
“When you answered the phone yesterday… what were you apologizing to my brother for?”
“Oh.” Jared felt the shame that had been replaced with fear over the last day returning and he looked away from Jensen’s sister down to his own feet. “We got into a fight… I lied to him about something that was going on at home because I didn’t want him to worry about me. And he was pretty mad… That morning… God, the last time we talked was that morning. And I… I hung up on him after I said…” Jared stopped, his throat and eyes burning.
“Jared…” Mackenzie reached to take his hand again, squeezing it gently. “He’s going to forgive you.”
“I hope so.” Jared smiled at her, forcing back the tears.
“I know so. There are just some things that aren’t worth staying mad over… and there are more important things to be worrying about.” Jared nodded, sighing in agreement. “I’m going to try and get some sleep. Wake me up if you need me, okay?” Jared nodded, and pulled his cellphone out of his pocket. Out of habit, he checked his email before putting it onto airplane mode and attempting to get some sleep as well.
“Sir?” He blinked his eyes open, shaking his head to get his bearings. The plane was dark, small lights illuminating the walkway. He turned his head to see the flight attendant leaning over him, a smile on her face. “Would you like something to eat?” He shifted in his seat, straightening up and trying not to groan as his back and legs protested.
“Um, yeah.” He nodded and reached over to shake Mackenzie awake.
“We have cheese lasagna and salad or baked chicken with potato and broccoli.” She said, reaching onto her cart to hand over silverware to them.
“Um… I’ll have the chicken.” He said, Mackenzie agreeing beside him. The flight attendant moved around her cart quickly, preparing two plates while Mackenzie set up the tray tables from the seat backs in front of them. Jared thanked her and put the plates down.
“Who would have thought my first meal with my brother’s boyfriend would be without my brother and a thousand miles up in the air.” Jared snorted and started cutting up the chicken, working it into small bites. He wasn’t even sure if he could eat… Beside him, Mackenzie seemed to be feeling the same way and was cutting up everything on her plate into small pieces as well.
“We probably should try to eat something…” Jared sighed, pushing the food around.
“I know.” Mackenzie took a small bite of the chicken and shrugged. “It’s not bad.”
“He’s going to be okay.” Jared said, spearing a piece of broccoli on his fork. “He has to be.” Mackenzie nodded beside him and they fell back into silence, slowly picking at their food. When the flight attendant came back to clear up the dinner plates, Jared was surprised to find he had managed to eat half of the plate. Mackenzie had given up on hers and had turned her body back towards the window and already fallen back asleep.
“Can I get you anything else, Sir?”
“Do you have any blankets available?” He asked, smiling his thanks when the woman returned with a small blue fleece. He shook it out and pulled Mackenzie away from the window to lean against his shoulder, throwing the blanket over her upper body. She mumbled softly, letting herself be shifted and falling asleep once her head hit Jared’s shoulder.
He brushed her hair back out of his face and was suddenly hit with a longing to see his own sister. He was sure Jeff had told his family what was going on… when they had gotten back to Jared’s apartment the night before, he could barely function, short of ordering the plane ticket to Austin and packing a bag. Jeff had to reign him back in from sitting at the JFK terminal for the next ten hours until he could board his plane.
He could faintly remember Jeff talking to Megan, or maybe it was his mom, that morning as Jeff accompanied him to the airport. He hurriedly said goodbye to his brother, barely hugging him before he tore through the terminal to get started on his trip.
He had to remember to thank Jeff for helping him function that night and not completely falling apart…
He sighed, leaning his head on top of Mackenzie’s and letting his eyes fall closed again. His stomach felt full, almost too full as anxiety worked its way through his body. He clenched his firsts down and tried to concentrate on his breathing. He needed to sleep, he wouldn’t get to Jensen any faster by being over tired or panicking.
And he would get to Jensen. And Jensen would be okay. It wouldn’t be fair or just for anything truly bad to happen. This was bad enough. And Jensen deserved to be okay. And he would be. He had to be. And with that last thought, Jared fell asleep until the plane landed.
Jared stretched in the seat, causing Mackenzie to jerk awake, her eyes dancing rapidly around the plane as she realized they landed. Jared nodded to her, understanding fully how she was feeling. The butterflies in his stomach were more like rocks, pounding and twisting deep in his gut. He forced himself to relax, to not shove people out of his way.
“We have to get to the rental car place.” Mackenzie said as they moved to the baggage claim, waiting to collect their bags. There was a large sign hanging over the exit doors ‘Welcome to Langenlonsheim’.
“Okay… And how long until we get to the hospital?” Jared asked, reaching down to grab his bag and throwing it over his shoulder.
“Um…” She unfolded the paper and scanned it quickly. “It’s about 90km away so I think it should take about an hour or so…”
“Can we drive in Germany?” Jared asked, taking her bag for her so she could continue looking at the printed papers.
“I don’t know.” She shrugged her shoulders. “We are just meeting someone at the rental place. I was going to get us train tickets but Mom said this was just easier. I’m not sure if he works for the military or the hospital or whatever, but Mom used him to get to the hospital too.” Jared nodded, glad she was taking the lead.
The airport was a decent size and Mackenzie had to stop more than once to get clarification on directions. Jared was sure that was more because her German wasn’t the greatest but wasn’t going to suggest it.
“I took four years of German in high school.” She muttered as they turned away from the last person they had asked.
“I don’t know. I took Spanish.” Jared shrugged.
They finally found the rental place and Mackenzie looked around slowly until she spotted a man holding up a small sign. She grabbed Jared’s arm, tugging him forward.
“Miss Mackenzie Ackles?” The man asked as they approached, his voice low with a thick German accent.
“Yes, and this is my husband, Jared.” She smiled, still holding onto Jared’s arm.
“Okay.” The man smiled and gestured to a small car parked behind him. He popped open the trunk and waited for Jared and Mackenzie’s bags to be deposited before he took his spot in the front seat. Shrugging Mackenzie let herself into the backseat, leaving the door open for Jared.
It became clear as they started on the road, that the man was not very good with his English. Mackenzie entertained herself with small talk, utilizing the German she remembered. The man was patient, correcting and laughing as they talked. Jared was grateful for the distraction and to be allowed to fall back into his own thoughts.
He was going to see Jensen. His heart hammered in his chest. He didn’t know what to expect…. How bad Jensen would look, how sick he truly was… but he would be seeing him. His fingers itched as he thought about running his hand across Jensen’s cheek, twisting their fingers together, pulling Jensen against his chest.
He closed his eyes and prayed. He was never a religious man, his parents had made all of their kids attend church through their first communion and then they were allowed to choose if they wanted to go. Jared had seen far too many things working in healthcare and preferred to believe in science rather than a higher power. Hell, he wasn’t really sure what it was that he fully believed. But he needed something.
He prayed for Jensen to be okay. For his injuries to heal and for Jensen to heal. He prayed that Jensen would be awake when they got there and would at least listen to his apology. Even if Jensen was really, truly, still mad at him and uninterested in continuing their relationship? Jared just wanted, no needed him to be okay.
“We’re here.” Mackenzie whispered, her voice shaking as she reached out to grab Jared’s hands in his. The car rolled up to a giant iron fence, a man in a uniform stepping out of a small building to approach the car.
“State your business?” He asked and repeated himself in German.
“We are here to visit my brother.” Mackenzie leaned forward to look out the open window. “ID Jared.” She dug through her purse and grabbed her ID and passport to hand over to the guard. Jared dug through his pocket to produce the same and hand them over.
“Wait here.” The man nodded to them and walked back into the small building. Mackenzie leaned back into seat and sighed. Jared suddenly felt nervous for a different reason. What if they knew he wasn’t supposed to be there? This was the Government they were planning on lying to. What if they asked him what his relationship with Jensen was? What was he supposed to say? He clenched his hands and pushed them between his legs, hoping he only felt like he was shaking and not actually doing so.
The guard returned after what felt like an hour and reached in to hand them back their IDs. Jared knew his hand was shaking as he reached forward to take his.
The guard was speaking in German to their driver and Jared briefly wondered why he hadn’t had to produce identification before deciding he didn’t care. The car was moving forward again and soon he was going to see Jensen.
Mackenzie was out of the car, seconds before it stopped completely. Jared opened his own door, smiling his thanks to their driver and collecting their bags from the trunk. He hoped there wouldn’t be an issue carrying large duffel bags through the military hospital… All he needed was to be arrested in Germany.
He found Mackenzie at the front desk and she was talking quickly to a nurse sitting there. The woman nodded and offered to hold their bags at the front desk so they didn’t have to carry them. Jared relaxed, handing them over and focused his attention back on Mackenzie.
“Well?” He asked as they stepped away from the desk.
“4th floor. Room 4450.” She said, reaching for Jared’s hand, seeking comfort. Jared squeezed and pulled her down the hall to the elevator sign. He pushed the up button, stomach plummeting as he waited for it to come. “We’re here.”
“I know.” He whispered back, closing his eyes to inhale deeply. “We’re going to see him.” She squeezed back in response, pulling him gently into the elevator and pressing the button.
“I’m scared.” She said after a moment, her eyes locked on the neon number as it counted up the floors with a soft pinging sound.
“I am too.” Jared admitted, swallowing hard as the 4 pinged their arrival and the doors slid open to reveal a busy hallway. They stepped into it, and Jared was reminded of work. The same sounds, smells and sights of any hospital floor he had ever been on. He didn’t know if that made him feel any better knowing that Jensen was actually here.
“Come on.” Mackenzie said, walking forward to a small nurse’s station set back on the other side of the wall of the elevator. “We are here to see my brother.”
The nurse looked up quickly, shuffling some paperwork that was laying on the table. “Who is your brother?”
“Jensen Ackles. We were told he is in room 4450.” Jared said before Mackenzie could answer. The nurse’s eyes flashed to his, but they weren’t unkind. Instead, they looked sad.
“Down that hallway.” She pointed. “Right after the double doors on the left. He’s been a popular guy today.” Neither one of them replied as they started down the hallway.
Jared stopped short right outside of the door, his feet frozen to the ground. He couldn’t do this. He shouldn’t be here. What if Jensen didn’t want him there? His sister wasn’t angry, but what if his parents were? Mackenzie gave him a look, smiling sadly at him as she shook her head, nodding him forward.
He took a hesitant step to look into the room. A single bed was set up in the center of the room, long green curtains pulled all the way back to lay flush against the wall. There was a steady beeping from a monitor hanging behind the bed, displaying Jensen’s blood pressure, oxygen stats and heart rate. Cords for the monitor snaked down the wall, disappearing underneath a blanket into the respective places on Jensen’s body.
Jared swallowed hard as his eyes continued to take in the view. The floor and walls around the bed were a cheerful blue, a stark contrast to the blinding white of the furniture and blankets that were covering Jensen’s body. Jared looked, surprised to see Tom with a sling across his shoulder, staring at him in confusion and another soldier sitting in a chair with a cane beside him. Mackenzie moved into the room, gripping a woman’s shoulder and Jared knew it was Jensen’s mother.
He took a step forward, returning his focus on Jensen’s body he traveled his gaze up to Jensen’s face.
“Jensen.” Jared gasped, the rest of the hospital falling away. He stopped caring about the beeping of the monitors and over-com system. He stopped caring that Tom and another soldier were standing in the room, bandages of their own. He stopped caring about Mackenzie at his back and the woman who was sitting in a wooden chair by the side of the bed. He stopped caring about anything else except for the emerald green eyes, half-lidded and tired looking that widened as they met his across the room.
Jensen’s mouth fell open, in surprise or pain Jared couldn’t tell. And at that moment, he didn’t care. He crossed the room in three large steps, sinking to his knees at the side of the bed and catching Jensen’s reaching hand in his own, pulling it against his chest.
“Jensen.” He whispered again. He could feel the tears sliding down his cheeks, he could hear the sob in Jensen’s throat. Jensen squeezed his hand and Jared stopped caring about everything and pushed forward to press his lips against Jensen’s, melting into the feeling of soft, warm lips kissing him back.
It was all going to be okay.
Chapter Ten
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Tom is going to die of a damned heart attack! I hope he just accepts that Jensen is who he is, and...loves who he loves.
So glad Mackenzie & Mrs A are there to help keep things calm.
My best Navy buddy developed necrotizing fasciitis from cutting his hand on barnacles while diving. No one was allowed near him without surgical gowns and gear. They kept OB in an ICU isolation area for nearly 2 weeks because that stuff spreads so badly thru cuts or scratches. We were terrified we would lose him. The doctor had warned that it always takes surgery to remove the infected flesh and that the risk of amputation was really high, plus it usually causes organ problems, like kidneys shutting down. OB survived thank God but lost a few fingers.
I would have thought Jared would have had experience with the bacterial disease since hospitals have to watch surgical patients for it. I've had MRSA and had to warn the anesthesiologist and surgeons so they could take special measures during my past 2 operations.
I sure hope this will not cause Jensen too much loss body-wise. I know Jared would still love him but this disease is keeping him in hospital for a few weeks.
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It's totally scary. I was in the hospital for a month and had therapy for my arm afterwards. But-- it's been 5 years and I have full use of my arm (just some numb areas). I got into surgery quickly and the infection never reached my muscle.
I'll be explaining Jensen's experience more in the next Chapter. I'm glad your friend ended up okay!!! It does not have a high survival rate... So that in itself is a blessing!!!
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Have a girlfriend who had spider bite on her calf pick up the flesh-eating bacteria. Like with your arm, they wanted to amputate above the knee. She asked to have the calf mound removed first then if that didn't work she'd allow more..... thank God it worked. After lots of therapy her worst reminder is wearing pants for rest of time to cover the disfigured lower leg.
Thank God you survived, sweetheart. We would have lost a promising young writer and your husband would be missing a lady who sounds like a terrific partner.
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It's so scary, and since it's rare and moves so quickly, its the quickest solution to just amputate. I'm glad they didn't for me, or for her!!
And aww, thank you! You have me blushing!
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Haha yeah, I thought of that afterwards. Though, when I've gotten patients with it at my work, it's a hit or miss. People usually recognize 'Flesh Eating Bacteria' better than Necrotizing Fasciitis.
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And I am so very happy to hear that your husband has been safe so far. If he is still over seas, I will add him (as well as you) to my prayers. Hope that's okay.
Okay, on to the story. Mackenzie is super awesome to do what she did for the boys. She definitely wins sister of the year award. ^_^
But when she called Jared and he flipped out before she said those two magic words, 'He's alive', I have to admit, I flipped out a little too. That really is a scary feeling. I don't know if I'd ever be able to handle that. Actually, I know I wouldn't.
The whole hospital room scene had my heart pounding out of my chest for a few reasons. One, Jensen was awake and the expression on his face (well, wide eyes) was priceless. Two, Jared didn't care who was there, nothing and no one mattered as he went over to Jensen and kissed him. That actually had me going 'awww' and 'yes'. lol. Three, Tom and another friend was there witnessing Jensen kissing another guy.
So, yeah. Heart pounding, and stomach in knots worrying whats gonna be said. But Tom better be a good friend and accept Jensen for who he really is. He should say something like, 'So that's why I've never seen you hook up with a chick. It all makes sense now' ;) Or whatever. lol.
I hope Jensen gets better. I hope him and Jared can get over their fight. I hope Jensen gets to go home soon so Jared can nurse him back to health. *wink wink*
Really amazing chapter. I'm nervous to see what happens next thought. I almost forgot about Chad. :\
<3
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Writing this chapter had me very anxious all through it as well!! I try to get in tune with my characters, I hope that comes across, and so I was just as scared for Jared and Mackenzie even though I knew what was going on with Jensen!
Unfortunately, Chad has not disappeared, but the boys have a good support system and each other!
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